Childfree: The 10 Most Common Myths

Childfree (English childfree - free from children; English childless by choice, voluntary childless - voluntarily childless) is a subculture and ideology characterized by a conscious reluctance to have children.

Many myths and stereotypes related to childfree are spreading, which we will try to refute today.

Family without children of their own free will

1. Childfree impose their views on others

Many accuse childfree of promoting their views, appealing to the fact that they even have their own community. This is not a sect, and these people are not interested in recruiting new members. Let's argue sensibly: does it make sense for a person to convince another that a childless family is better?

In life, just the opposite is happening: childfree become an object for re-education from those who have children. That is why childfree is more comfortable communicating with like-minded people. However, like all people. It does not occur to anyone to arrange rallies against the birth of children. Of course, maybe there are a couple of fanatics, but there are fanatics in any sphere of life. Many childfree don’t even advertise their position in front of friends and family, they just live as they think is right.

2. Childfree hate children

Of course not. Most childfree children are neutral, and some with sympathy, and can even work as teachers, teachers, child psychologists in child care facilities. The point is not in hatred, but in the fact that for some reason a person does not want to have his own children. There are individuals who display aggression, but these can also be found among parents. In general, as a rule, childfree does not speak out against children in general, but rather against parents who allow their children too much, regardless of the interests of society.

3. Infertile and psychologically unhealthy people do not have children

This is a completely baseless statement. As a rule, the main argument in this case is that a healthy person always wants to have his own child, he simply cannot but want the kids. But you must admit: the reproductive function in no way should determine priorities in human life. After all, none of us is doing something solely because we are able to do it.

For example, many can train hard and achieve high results in a sport, but only a few do it. Why? - It all depends on desire. This also applies to the birth of children: it is necessary that there is not only opportunity, but also desire. It is worth noting that the lack of desire does not mean that a person has a psychological problem. It is about a conscious life choice.

And there can be many reasons for making such a decision: from the desire to achieve high career results to the unwillingness to take responsibility. Someone wants to live only for themselves and is sure that the child will limit his freedom. Someone does not want children, as it is expensive, and buying a new gadget or traveling to another continent seems to be the best investment. Someone is not sure that he will become a good parent, and wants to realize himself in another area of ​​life. Standards of behavior other than generally accepted are not a mental deviation.

After all, it is better that only those who really want it give birth.

4. They are alone, so they have no one to have a baby with.

People condemning childfree love to say: “Yes, you just did not have a normal guy!”. Here, too, one can argue, since most childfree are quite happy in family life, and in such a family both spouses do not want to have a child.

5. Childfree's goal is to destroy the human race

This is really funny, because 90% of people on the planet become parents. Earth does not face extinction, even if the number of childfree annually increases, their percentage will still be negligible. So this is not the most successful plan for the extermination of mankind.

6. Children are the meaning of life, so it’s empty in childfree

Everyone has his own meaning of life. Yes, and what is it? No one has been able to answer this question yet. If you think that your destiny is to give birth to a child and raise him as a good person, this does not mean that it should be for everyone.

Some find their purpose in work, others in their own “I”. Someone in improving the world, someone in saving the lives of other people and helping those in need. And if they do not have children, then their life can not be called meaningless. To each his own.

7. Childfree - a new fashion trend

This name, indeed, appeared relatively recently - in the twentieth century. However, this does not mean that such people did not exist before. Just in the old days, freedom of choice was limited by a large number of conventions - from church bans to the lack of contraception. But personal desire did not matter.

Previously, there were also those who did not want to have children. Popular methods for aborting helped in this. It was easier for the rich: their children were surrounded by so many nannies that allowed the mother not to touch her children. All this suggests that childfree were then.

8. Their destiny is loneliness in old age.

Having children cannot guarantee that in old age you will not experience loneliness. There can be many reasons for this. Each person can expect loneliness in old age, regardless of whether he has children or not.

All childfree awaits a lonely old age, and there will be no one to give them a glass of water on the deathbed.

In response to such a statement, childfree often recalls a joke: “A man lived a long life, raised children, put all his strength on them, with the thought that he would be serving someone a glass of water in old age. It was time for him to die, his whole family gathered around him - his wife, children, grandchildren. A man lies and thinks: “But I don’t feel like drinking ...”.

9. A woman who does not want to have children is unnatural

A man who does not have children is less likely to condemn and criticize. But a woman who can have children, but doesn’t want to, is unnatural. A woman is required to have children. A man can make a choice in favor of a career, few will reproach him, but a woman will be condemned by everyone who is not lazy.

We must finally understand: giving birth is not an obligation, but only desire and opportunity. In the absence of a desire to have children, there is nothing unnatural for either men or women.

10. Childfree is forever

It is human nature to change under the influence of external factors and to revise our beliefs from the perspective of a new experience. Of course, there is a certain percentage of principled people who make decisions once and for all.But the average person can change his interests, political views, change his religious confession over the course of his life, which means that he cannot be denied the opportunity to rethink his position in life.

Agree: childfree is not as scary as many talk about them. And to lead a discussion and argue about whether everyone needs to have children, it is possible to infinity and to no avail, but we will never find an answer. It is important to simply understand that this is a personal choice of each person, and not to judge this choice. This will be a manifestation of tolerance.