Sharing a dream with a child - benefit or harm

About myself a little bit:

As far as I can remember, nowhere have I slept so soundly as in my parent's bed. As an adult and visiting my mother, I no, no, and I’m gonna snitch on her pillow. And so much power comes! No wonder. The strongest bond between people is the bond between parents and children. I notice that my sons often fall asleep sweetly on my bed.

Before the birth of the firstborn, many, including pediatricians, told me that children should be taught to sleep only in their own crib. This should foster independence, responsibility. I agreed with them while this was a theory. After giving birth, the son established his rules in the house. To listen to him screaming for hours in a cradle and looking at me with blue reproach was beyond my strength. Not more than half an hour later, my son slept deeply in my bed.

What is a child looking for?

1. Mom is warmer, safer.
2. The emotional connection did not break with the umbilical cord.
3. A man, albeit a small one, is a social being.
4. Parental aura protects at the energy level.

My husband, after a night shift, was forced to transfer his son back to the cradle. Over time, I noticed that every night the morning sleep in the family did not exist. The child woke up and woke everyone. Over time, youth won, and her husband had no choice but to move to another room for several years. The family reigned calm.

What did I get

She noticed that the dream next to her son was some kind of healing. Has come

• calm
• attitude towards people has become more equal;
• maternal feelings have acquired a conscious depth;
• my son and I began to understand each other at a subconscious level without words;
• Serious feelings for her husband.

Yes, yes, through tenderness and love for the child, I realized how strong my attachment to my husband, father of my son, how much stronger our feelings became.

Two is not a family yet

It came by accident, all of a sudden. Looking at my men, small and large, eventually peacefully sharing a place near me, I realized that happiness had settled. There is a child’s age when it is vital for him to be closer to his parents. You can not deprive him of this for the sake of scientific theories and pedagogical fabrications. Everything must obey the laws of nature. This is my firm conviction, as the mothers of four sons.

Several years passed, and the son no longer ran to our bed in the morning. He became an "adult", independent. And this is also not necessary to prevent. The child moved to a new stage in his formation as a separate person.

Like a carbon copy, this story was repeated with my other sons.

Is there any harm in a shared dream

In my experience, I did not notice such harm. In theory, he probably is:

• You can accidentally hit the child in a dream, crush with your weight;
• relationships between parents may be upset;
• selfish notes in the character of the child may appear.

We read additionally and in detail: baby is sleeping with mom. Is it dangerous or not?

One thing I will say, each family should have its own recipes for the correct upbringing of children, based on traditions, pedagogical experience and a reasonable, attentive attitude to each other.

We also read:

• Sleeping with your child - together or apart: the pros, cons, tips
• Mom's experience: the baby should sleep separately
• We teach a child to sleep in his crib separately from his mother (video, real stories)

Joint dream. Pediatrician's look

There are different opinions about sharing a dream with a baby. Does it affect the formation of the independence of the child? At what age do you need to wean a child from sharing sleep? How to do it? Violetta Kulishova talked with two specialists: a pediatrician Natalia Anatolievna Zelenikina and a psychologist, Anna Lapshina, a breastfeeding consultant. What opinion to listen to - you decide!

Mom's opinion