My experience: the child should sleep separately

Content

Nine months, mother and child were one. That is why the tiny man is so firmly attached to his mother and quickly calms down next to her. Is it possible that after the birth of crumbs, mothers should so carefully maintain this connection, falling asleep with the baby? Is it really necessary, and how will this be reflected in the internal well-being of the family? Adapting to the interests of a small person, it is important for parents not to lose personal space. But a newborn requires so much care and attention that sometimes sharing a dream seems to be the only way out during sleepless nights. How to do the right thing?

Modern pediatricians and child psychologists agree that there are many advantages to sharing a dream: parents do not need to jump from bed to cradle in the middle of the night, and the baby sleeps sweetly under her warm mother’s chest. The older generation unanimously insists that it is possible to crush a child. There is no consensus on this issue, however, our own experience has seen from our own experience that the crumbs have no place in their parents at all.

Fears or logic?

We tried not to listen to the screaming grandmothers, rebelling against joint sleep. I was an educated modern mother who read many useful publications that emphasize all of its virtues. Joint sleep perfectly synchronizes the biorhythms of mother and child, which makes the first much easier to wake up at any night. Yes, and young parents do not have to constantly jump to the crib at the slightest squeak of a small family member. In addition, I knew that milk production was so significantly improved. I can list many more advantages of joint sleep, but on the opposite side of the scales there were ordinary parental fears.

Fear of accidentally hitting a baby. My husband is often very tossing and turning in his sleep. Once he turned over in his sleep and put his bruise under his eye with his elbow, which was embarrassing to be shown in public. And if a newborn were next to him, what could happen then?
Fear that the child will fall out of bed. Suddenly, when we are fast asleep, our baby will fall to the floor and be injured?
The fear that weaning a child from joint sleep will be very difficult. We were especially frightened by the example of our close friends, with whom the child constantly slept until 5 years old.
Fear that the baby will bury its nose in something in bed and suffocate. My husband and I did not want to remove the blankets from the bed, nor change our comfortable bed to a hard mattress.

Nevertheless, these fears prevailed, because soon in our bedroom appeared a cute crib with a hard mattress and a nice bedding set.

We also read: How to choose a crib for a newborn - what are the cots

Underwater rocks

But the baby did not appreciate such beauty at all! Rather, he slept well in the crib, but during the shift from my hands he began to cry a lot. My husband and I could calm the screaming lump only after 4-5 attempts. In addition, every night I jumped out of bed several times in alarm: this kind of excitement is characteristic of young mothers.

Initially, it seemed to me that after feeding, I forgot to put the baby in bed - probably, he was confused in a blanket! I rumbled up the bed in fear: every one fold on the blanket seemed to me sleepy with a tiny pen or baby foot. There was no end to this nightmare!

Sleep experience with baby

After an exhausting week, I decided to try a joint sleep with the baby. I fed him, left him nearby and tried to sleep. But then dad started tossing and turning - would he crush the baby? Then the baby began to move - he could get tangled up in blankets! I decided to put the child on the edge of the bed, putting the blanket directly on the floor: even if the baby slipped, it would fall on the soft one.

I could not fall asleep: I was cold without a blanket, every sound was like the wheezing of a panting baby. So I tormented for several hours, and then put my son in bed and instantly fell asleep. Sleeping together is completely not for me. I'd rather sleep peacefully, albeit with some interruptions, than not sleep at all!

Way out

We quickly found a solution to the existing problems, and there were two of them: we had to vagaries during the transfer to the cradleas well as my worries at night.

First problem was allowed this way: we tried free swaddling. Wrapped baby after feeding did not even notice a change in location. Since that day, we have been actively applying free swaddling, every week relaxing diapers. A month later, we just wrapped our little baby's legs a little.
Second problem camomile baths were easily eliminated: after such procedures, I became more relaxed and calm, because my searches in blankets at night gradually disappeared. Everything around has found its harmony.

Benefits of Separate Sleep

Safety for crumbs: the baby now continues to calmly dream in a children's orthopedic mattress without any risk of falling or suffocating, as well as being crushed.
Personal space for me and my husband, as well as the ability to sleep in any position without fear of rolling over.
Slight weaning: Not accustomed to having nights at mother’s breasts, our son just broke up with breastfeeding. When the child turned one year old, he easily left our room and moved into his own.

Whatever advice you give around, only the parents make the decision. We said no to our joint sleep and never regretted this choice.

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