Template stereotypes that prevent a young mother from living

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Many myths go about how a good mother should be. Guided by them, people around and strive to point out to a woman her mistakes, and this so overshadows the joy of motherhood. And often being in the fetters of the stereotypical “so accepted” we do what others want from us, and not what we want. We will try to debunk some of the generally accepted myths in this article.

Good mom never gets tired

Caring for a child takes a lot of energy, therefore, like all people, mom gets tired. Of course, she loves the baby, she waited a long time for him, but sometimes she just wants to sit in silence for about 20 minutes, watch TV or chat with her friend on the phone. These are ordinary human needs, in which there is nothing surprising or shameful.

Good mom is the perfect wife

After spending several sleepless nights, in the evening the young mother is no longer able to accept her husband’s playful offer. Falling asleep from fatigue, she feels guilty whenever she refuses sex. Or she is no longer up to ironing her husband’s shirt for tomorrow or frying cutlets for dinner. Of course, there are reproaches from the spouse: “You sit at home all day, do not do anything complicated. What could you get tired of? ”

We also read: Why are you tired? You're sitting at home! Or a memo to husbands who do not understand all the “charms” of maternity leave

Words are useless here. Leave your husband alone with the child for half a day - having been in your place, he will understand how much strength and patience you need to take care of the baby, and also to keep the house clean. Deadlines at work and lengthy meetings are exhausting, but all this is nothing compared to 20 minutes of tantrum of a one-year-old child.

A good mom shouldn’t leave her baby for a long time

“For a long time” means a month or even a longer time. It will really be difficult for the baby to endure such a long separation. However, a young mother can afford to go to a beauty salon or sit in a cafe with girlfriends. For a couple of hours that the baby will spend with his grandmother, dad, aunt, nothing terrible will happen, and you can work out with him in English or add the pyramid at another time. And it’s worthwhile to listen to the opinion of psychologists who assure that it is useful for children from the cradle to learn to communicate with different people.

A good mother manages everything herself and does not ask for help

How is a regular day for a young mother? - taking care of the baby, cooking, washing and ironing, mopping, going to the supermarket for groceries .. what else should a good mom do in time? - vacuum, wipe the dust, water the flowers ... Cinderella is practically emerging,unless you need to separate the beans from the peas.

Part of the housework is important and needs to be transferred to other family members (moreover, to do this without any doubt and constraint) - the husband, the older children.

Try for the first time to say the phrase "I do not have time, could you ...". At first it will be difficult for you to admit that you are not coping and ask for help, but it will soon become easier and life will get better. If only the assistants could do it!

A good mother must give her children a better education.

Now children have very high loads. Toddlers go to development centers, older children go to a gymnasium with a mathematical bias or with in-depth study of foreign languages, and after school they attend sports sections, music schools. All this is done so that in the end the child enters the most prestigious university in the country, and, if funds allow, it is better for him to continue to study abroad.

In reality, it is far from always necessary to apply modern methods and activities in order for the child to develop normally. Children are already curious, they are interested in everything, so you need to answer their “why” - and they will learn this world, strive for new knowledge.

A good mom never makes a mistake

With the birth of a baby, a woman develops excellent intuition. Only she cannot predict that during the walk it will suddenly rain and the baby will get wet and catch a cold. Mom cannot predict that the child will suddenly run, fall and break his knees. Yes, and that the crumbs will show an allergy to the pills prescribed by the doctor, she can not find out in advance.

No matter how much mom loves her child, she remains an ordinary person who stumbles, makes mistakes. It is impossible to be perfect and to avoid all problems. But, if you keep calm, you can draw invaluable experience from your mistakes. Then the next time, finding yourself in a similar situation, it will turn out to make the right decision.

A good mom has perfect children

There is such a stereotype that a good mother should raise an obedient child who eats broccoli and cabbage with an appetite, does not make noise, does not be naughty, who sat down at 4 months and spoke at 9. He is deceased, quiet, completely independent, without preferences in food and clothing, not paying attention to himself, perfectly understanding any requests from his parents. Also, a good mom doesn’t show up in a child age crisesthat all children go through.

It is unlikely that you can find such a baby all over the world. A normal, healthy child is a cheerful prankster (for that he is a child), he is mobile, he vigorously expresses his joy and his discontent. Forget about the characteristics of “ideal” children and love yours because they are special.

A good mother must give her children a better education.

In fact, for the development of the child some special classes and techniques are not always needed. The baby will be happy to learn the world, just listening to the stories of his beloved mother, because he is interested to learn about everything that is happening around.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43cSrqdO-IA