How to choose a nanny for a child

Choosing a nanny for a child is a difficult and responsible matter. This is the person with whom your child is left alone, who communicates with your child, cares for him and educates him. Therefore, it is very important not to make a mistake with the choice. How to choose the right nanny, what are they, what should you pay attention to when choosing?

Types of Nannies

Child psychologists and parents have long divided all the nannies into several conventional types. This division helps parents to navigate exactly what kind of nanny they need to look after the child. Moreover, the nanny for the baby and for the 5-year-old baby is very different from one another. Not every nanny is equally able to look after both the baby and the five-year-old fidget. So, about the types:

• A nanny with a medical background (doctor or nurse). Medical education is a very valuable quality. Especially when caring for a baby. The medical nanny is well versed in issues such as sterility, childhood diseases and their symptoms, proper care for the baby, and feeding. They are especially accurate, in case of a baby’s disease they can provide him with competent primary care, massage, etc. Practice shows that medical nannies do not refuse to stay with the baby not only day or night. The main disadvantage of this category of nannies is that they look after the child more than they bring him up. In the case of the baby, this is quite acceptable, but when he grows up, then the parents will most likely have to think about finding another nanny;
• Arina Rodionovna. This is the name of older women, most often pensioners. Such nannies have many advantages. They raised their own children, they most likely have grandchildren. Therefore, they should not occupy experience in dealing with children. Usually they are extremely patient with the baby, can tidy up the room and feed the baby deliciously. "Arins Rodionovna" love to walk with children for a long time, they are taken to zoos, museums and other places useful for the child. They readily read books to the child and patiently respond to the endless children's “why.” Old nannies usually have plenty of free time, and therefore they can work all day and even overtime. Their main drawback is the upbringing and treatment of the child "the old fashioned way", as well as the desire to educate not only the baby, but also his parents. Another disadvantage is that it is usually difficult for the “nanny-grandmother” to help the child with lessons;
• Female students. They are also called "nannies for an hour." They are young, and therefore they do not have the proper experience of caring for children.Usually they have little free time, as they devote most of the day to study. Therefore, nanny students work on a case-by-case basis, regarding the care of someone else’s baby as an occasional part-time job. Hence the corresponding attitude to work. Usually such nannies are hired when there are no other options;
• Professional nanny. Usually this is a middle-aged woman who has worked as a nanny for many years. This is her main profession. She has considerable experience, she worked with many children, can provide recommendations from those families where she previously worked. She knows how to find contacts with almost any child, as well as with his parents. A professional nanny can equally successfully communicate with children of any age - from babies to elementary school students. She knows how to swaddle a baby, how to feed him or to help with a disease. A professional nanny can accompany a child when he and his parents travel long distances - for example, on vacation or abroad. With her, you can fearlessly leave the child for a long time. The professional nanny is the best parental choice.

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When choosing a nanny, you should consider how much time she needs. If for several hours a day or 1-2 times a week, then a professional nanny will hardly agree to this. In this case, it is better to look for an old woman or student.

Schedule

Nannies can work on different schedules. In this sense, they are divided into:

• Full time nannies. These babysitters work from morning to evening. That is, until the child’s parents come home from work. Throughout the day, the nanny is with the child, feeds him, walks with him, puts him to bed, studies;
• At the evening nannies. As follows from the definition, they work in the evenings. Evening nannies meet the child from school or pick up from the kindergarten, prepare dinner for the baby, feed him, put him to bed. Their working time ends when the parents come home;
• At the nanny with accommodation. They usually live all week in the family that hired them to look after the baby. In accordance with the agreement, the nanny with accommodation is provided one or two days off. It happens that she is allocated a separate room. In other cases, she sleeps in the same room with the baby. In addition to caring for a child, a nanny with accommodation can be engaged in other duties: help with the housework, prepare food for the baby and its parents;
• For babysitters by the day. Daily babysitters are usually needed in cases where the child needs supervision around the clock. Usually these are babies or sick children. For the most part, daily babysitters work in shifts - day after day.

A separate category is the accompanying nannies. They are usually hired when a mother with a baby (or several children) has to travel long distances. The duties of the accompanying nanny include taking care of the children during the trip, as well as looking after the kids in the new place until they return.

Nanny Responsibilities

Before you start looking for a nanny, you need to decide what her responsibilities will be. It is clear that not all child care matters can be attributed to the nanny. She cannot do something, she does not want to do something for one reason or another. And in something else - no nanny, even the most qualified, can replace her mother: for example, in breastfeeding. Therefore, first of all, it is necessary to determine the list of the most important responsibilities, and all other nuances should be decided as they arise.

So, the nanny should:

• Carry out full care of the baby;
• Ensure its safety;
• Bathe the baby and fulfill other hygiene requirements;
• Observe the daily routine: put the child to bed on time, walk with him;
• Cook the baby and feed him;
• Follow the sanitary order in the children's room;
• Accompany him while visiting clubs, sports sections;
• Visit with him exhibitions, museums, attractions;
• Know the features of the child’s age development and apply their knowledge in practice;
• Help the child (if he is a preschooler) get ready for school;
• To help the pupil in completing the lessons.

This is only an approximate and far from complete list of the duties of a nanny. Any other responsibilities are negotiated with parents additionally, as soon as the need arises.

We also read:What is the difference between a nanny and a governess?

Additional requirements

Many parents try to find a nanny for their baby exclusively with teacher education. Indeed, the nanny teacher has many advantages. She knows the methods of child development, can understand music, be able to draw, know foreign languages, etc. All this she will teach the baby, as a result of which he will grow up as a comprehensively developed personality. In addition, the nanny teacher will be able to prepare the baby for school, and in the future help him with the lessons.

All these are the advantages associated with the nanny with teacher education. However, there are also disadvantages. Currently, some educators (as well as psychologists) are trained in Western models of parenting, which in many respects do not coincide with our ideas and worldview. For example, many educators now believe that a child should not be limited in anything, everything must be allowed to him, otherwise he will grow up a notorious and inferior personality. Therefore, before hiring an educator, a teacher, you should carefully understand his worldview and methods of education.

A nanny who does not have a teacher education. There are many more such nannies than with a teacher’s diploma. They can be young girls, or maybe women in years. They usually do not have any of their own upbringing methods, and therefore it is much easier for them to explain the parental point of view on the upbringing of the baby. The only significant minus is that a nanny without pedagogical education will most likely be more difficult to prepare a child for school.

A woman who has her own children. The main advantages of such nannies are their everyday experience and ability to communicate with children. They will look after the child properly, feed him correctly and on time, answer all his questions, etc. At the same time, some nannies from this category may not listen to the wishes of the baby’s parents, explaining that by virtue of their experience they’re better They know how to raise a child.

However, all of these nuances are completely solvable. Much more important is the other - what kind of nanny is the person. If she has a nasty character, bad habits, limited horizons and an inappropriate vocabulary, then it is better to refuse her services. The reasons for the refusal are understandable: communicating with a dubious nanny, your child will voluntarily or involuntarily pick up from her those human qualities that she possesses.

We also read: 8 tips for choosing a nanny

How to look for a nanny

1. The first and most common way is to advertise in newspapers or on the Internet. Here, in fact, there is only one plus: such a search method does not require large expenses, but there are plenty of minuses. Among the advertisers there may be former nannies expelled for serious misconduct from their previous places, as well as nannies with no experience. Another category is the so-called “lovers of strange husbands” or thieves who are looking for ways to rub themselves into someone else’s house in order to then rob him. Therefore, it is more reasonable to hold the first meeting with such applicants not at home, but somewhere in neutral territory.
2. The second way is to search through recruitment agencies. There are many more advantages: agencies can offer you an impressive list of candidates for every taste along with characteristics, recommendations, medical certificates. But at the same time, there are enough minuses: you have to pay for the agency’s services, many candidates are nannies only from their own words, some may have false documents. In addition, the recruitment agencies themselves should not be trusted indiscriminately.There have been cases where some agencies deliberately went to deceive customers, trying to bring them not with professionals in their field, but with random people.
3. The surest way to find a nanny is to recommend your acquaintances, colleagues, friends, relatives. Usually none of them will recommend a bad candidate. You will know almost everything about such a nanny: her habits, abilities, marital status, place of residence, work experience. There is only one significant minus here: if for some reason you refuse it, then you risk spoiling your relations with those who recommended it.

How to get acquainted with the nanny

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Getting acquainted with the nanny, you should carefully look at all the little things. This is understandable: it is to her that you will entrust the most precious thing that you have - your child. First of all, you need to pay attention to the appearance of the candidate for babysitting your baby. If she looks untidy, this is a good reason to refuse her.

After a visual acquaintance, it is recommended to ask the candidate a few general questions. These can be questions on a variety of topics: does she know how to cook, what dishes are best for her, does she like to walk, can she take her child to a section or clinic, what were her responsibilities in the same place, how did she get along with the child and his parents, etc. Do not be shy to ask her for a passport and medical certificates. You should also carefully read the letters of recommendation and call the numbers that are indicated in them.

In the event that the meeting takes place at your place, it is reasonable to invite other members of your family, as well as the child, to it. Conclusions about what a candidate is must be done from the very first step in your home. Did she come on time, did she say hello to you and the child, how sincere she was in the conversation, etc. When she leaves, you need to develop a general opinion and decide together whether this candidacy is suitable for your baby as a nanny.

After general questions, you need to get to know the future nanny closer, asking her more specific questions.

1) Questions about previous work:

• What duties did you fulfill in the previous place?
• Why didn’t you work there?
• How easily do you adapt to a new family?
• How long do children get used to you?
• What do you not like to do as a nanny?

2) Personal issues:

• How old are you?
• Do you have any education?
• What is your marital status?
• Do you have children, and what is their age?
• If the children are minors, then who will stay with them while you are at work?
• Do you have any hobbies, and which ones?
• Are you a believer, and what religion do you profess?
• How do you spend your free time and what is your social circle?

3) Health questions:

• Do you have a chronic illness?
• Can you raise a child in your arms?
• Do you have bad habits?
• How long have you been in fluorography?
• Do you agree to undergo an additional medical examination?

4) Discussion of future responsibilities:

• Can you linger if necessary?
• Do you agree to work on weekends?
• Do you agree to accompany the child if he leaves with his parents for a summer residence, in another city, in another country?

5) Discussion of payment terms:

• What salary do you expect?
• How do you want to be paid - every day, once a week, every month?
• How do you feel about penalties for absenteeism or being late?

6) Discussion of emergency behavior:

• What do you intend to do if the child chokes, faints, cries and is capricious, behaves inappropriately, gets sick (the list of situations can be continued)?

7) Background questions:

• What games can be played with a child at one age or another?
• For what reasons can children cry?
• What do you do if your child freaks you out?
• What is the main thing for you when caring for and communicating with your baby?

Well, of course, you should not discount your own maternal intuition.It is she who should be the decisive condition for whether to accept one or another candidate as a nanny or refuse her.

We also read: 19 rules that a nanny must follow

How to introduce a nanny to a child

So, the future nanny made a positive impression on you. However, this is not a reason to immediately take her to work. You need to make sure how your child will react to the candidate. This should be the last argument in your decision about whether or not your child needs such a nanny.

Watch your child’s reaction carefully. If he has a sociable character, then after how long will he try to get to know the nanny closer? If, on the contrary, the baby is uncommunicative, then how will the nanny behave in this case in order to attract him to her? If at first the child is afraid of the nanny, but thanks to her efforts, then she still begins to show interest in her, then this is an absolute plus for the nanny.

It is not necessary at the very beginning to leave the baby with the nanny for a long time. It will be more reasonable if the child gets used to it gradually. At the same time, the baby should try to explain that the nanny is a very good aunt who will teach him how to play, draw, walk with him, ride on the carousel, etc. Believing in your explanations, the child will be able to get used to it faster. And the last condition: when hiring a nanny, you must necessarily conclude an official labor contract with her.

How to control the work of the nanny

The fact that the work of the nanny needs to be controlled should not cause objections. The question is how to do it right. Firstly, inept control is difficult to achieve any specific results. Secondly, in this way you can offend the nanny.

The main control method is careful observation of the child. If he sleeps restlessly at night, is not happy about the nanny or is afraid of her, then this is already an occasion to reflect and strengthen his observations. If the baby, barely seeing you, begins to cry and seeks to escape from the nanny, then this is another reason for parental thoughtfulness. Additional reasons may also be that for a long time your baby has not learned anything new, he has incomprehensible bruises and scratches, the nanny in front of you behaves in an ingratiating manner, etc. With such signs regularly appearing, it is better to leave the nanny.

Your unexpected arrival home may give good results. Or - the same unexpected appearance in the house of your friends and relatives. It is also good to talk from time to time with neighbors who can see exactly how the nanny communicates with your child. Some parents even hire private detectives for such purposes.

There is one more practice-proven way to determine how good or, on the contrary, your baby's nanny is. A good nanny is one in whom the baby returns from a dirty trip, but at home he is always clean and washed. Everything is simple here. When a child walks fully, then usually he always gets dirty. A child can fully walk only when he feels comfortable with the nanny.

Recently, they are increasingly monitoring the work of nannies using cameras. This is perhaps the most effective form of control. In the press and on TV it is often reported that it was thanks to the video cameras that it was possible to expose the savages under the guise of nannies. It is better if the camcorders are installed in several places. It is clear that the nanny herself should not know anything about video surveillance.

Don't be jealous of your baby

The baby gets used to a good nanny quickly. It happens that he begins to call her "mother." Often this leads to the fact that real mothers begin to be jealous of the child to the nanny. And for this reason she is being fired. Thus, such mothers make a big mistake.

In this case, the feelings and psychology of the child are not taken into account. Being attached to someone is very important to him. And when that nanny, to which the baby has become attached, disappears from his life, and a new one appears in return, this can cause serious stress for the baby. No need to be jealous of the child and fear that the nanny can really replace a real mother.If the nanny is a professional, and also a wonderful person, then she will always find a way to explain to your baby that the real mother is you and no one else.

We also read:

• How to choose a nanny for a newborn baby - tips and tricks
• Nanny or nursery: what is best for a child?
• Grandmother or nanny: with whom to leave the child
• Mary Poppins forever, or how to stop changing babysitters. What is the Nanny Carousel
• Girlfriend as a nanny: “FOR” and “AGAINST”

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