All our problems come from childhood. Some parents almost did not pay attention, someone suffered from his excesses. And, of course, permanent bans ...
What is an ideal world for parents? A world in which children do not throw tantrums, eat well, recite Pushkin’s poems, read Shakespeare’s sonnets in the original and never cross-talk with adults.
Ideal children always and everywhere behave culturally. In clinics, in shops, in public transport, and just on the street, the child should not make noise. And no matter how old he is, this rule applies to at least two years. Well, if the child allows himself a prank - he must certainly be pulled and sharply besieged. And it turns out that we pull our children out for any reason, regardless of whether they really bother someone or not.
And if mom does not scream and does not make harsh remarks, then she is a bad mom. She is a useless mother who cannot even cope with her child. But who generally allows such klushov to give birth ?!
Techniques such as Montessori quite popular in the west, but have not yet found wide application in our country. Especially among people of the older generation, who in childhood except for a couple of wooden toys and a plastic baby doll had no joy. Does the child want to get into the closet and check what is there? To rattle with spoons and pans or open the door of a washing machine and see what is hidden inside? Parents, as a rule, try to protect the child from such research, without thinking about what ruins his desire for knowledge, thereby destroying the thirst for research. In trying to learn something new, small children can be incredibly stubborn. But parents trying to protect their children from everything in the world are no less stubborn. And at some point, the child will begin to realize that all his attempts are futile and will no longer strive for new discoveries.
And the child should always greet everyone and smile at the people with whom his relatives are talking. And it does not matter that the baby is only one year old, he must smile at the aunt with whom his mother is talking. Uncommunicative and impolite children only dishonor their mothers!
Ideally, children should be quieter than water, below the grass. A child crying in a clinic is a shame, a child running between shelves in a store is wild, a screaming child on an airplane is simply inappropriate, and if you came to a restaurant and the child threw a tantrum there, then this is generally unacceptable. Burning such a worthless mother in hell!
Almost everyone is forbidden to children, they try to drive them into a certain framework, beyond which it is simply impossible to go beyond.If European children do not indulge in food at the table, then Russian children are just a role model: in public places they are neither visible nor heard. But what is it in public, even at home, children are forbidden to play noisy games, run and jump on the floor, because at any moment an evil neighbor from below will come and tell the unfortunate mother everything that she thinks about her methods of education.
There are more and more bans every day. And, it would seem, mothers do this well-meaningly, they want to raise their children smart and well-mannered, but they do not appreciate it at all and always strive to clumsy behind us.
Over time, children, whom everyone forbids, become correct and comfortable. That's only when they cease to be children, they are always waiting for nervous breakdowns and problems in their own families.
But what happens if the child behaves the way he wants? Is it really going to make someone feel bad?
After all, not a single cabinet has suffered from the fact that its door was opened and closed 10 times. And the kitchen pots probably did not become worthless after the child played with them. Yes, and an unfamiliar aunt can think about raising a child whatever she wants, and nothing terrible will happen. Your child is the way he is - noisy, funny, inquisitive, smart. And if he is in a bad mood, he can allow himself to be a bit tricky. And please, do not deprive him of his childhood!
READ ALSO:
- What can and cannot be forbidden to a child
- Parental prohibitions - benefits and harms: a consultation with a psychologist Irina Mlodik
Watch the video: 9 things that should not be prohibited for children
