With the advent of a child, life always changes. From this moment on, everything will no longer be the same as before, and this is what scares many men. So it was with me. Only time passes - and at a certain moment comes the understanding that everything is as it should be: the past has remained in the past, and the present has become the present.
With the birth of my son, I had concerns about which I did not tell my wife. Yes, and generally did not tell anyone. I was scared for the child, because he is very small and defenseless, you never know what can happen to him. I was also afraid for my wife - she’s fragile, tender, she can’t cope and break. It was scary for myself too: it’s a shame to tell, but my first fears were connected not with the fact that a good father would not come out of me, but with the fact that I would never return to my usual, beloved way of life, and the culprit of everything - baby.
So days passed, then weeks, months. Suddenly it became clear to me: I no longer want it to be as it was before. I just outgrew this situation and these thoughts. The main thing in my life is my son, our family, but this is the best that could happen in my life. At this time, an understanding came of three simple and important truths that literally turned my worldview around.
1. Labor is worth laboring
I'm not talking about work at all. I mean another work. The point is that the more you try to work on your thoughts, analyze mistakes and mistakes, the more you end up gaining. It is necessary to work on yourself, to form new useful habits, to get rid of bad ones - and this will help to achieve your goal faster. The harder you work for the good of the family and in terms of raising a child, the more benefit it brings to everyone. However, there is an important condition: the rule will work if you really love your work and realize why you are making efforts.
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2. Connections are redundant
There are always a lot of people around us, who take a lot of time and energy. We spend time with them, we communicate - this does not bring much pleasure, we often do not agree with them, but we still spend time on them. So why? I asked this question to myself when I had less time for meetings, when I began to see friends and acquaintances less often. Unnecessary communications ceased by themselves.
3. Do not be afraid to depend on someone
Even after the wedding, I desperately resisted the thought that I depended on my wife, as she was on me. Loving people are always dependent on each other, it cannot be otherwise. After the birth of my son, I realized that I also depend on him. Now I can sincerely admit that without a wife and a child my life was empty. So I will depend on them all my life. I just want to hope that they will not use it, and I myself will not try to manipulate those who depend on me.
We also read:
Touched to almost tears! Fathers only seem so cold in appearance, but in their hearts they love their child very much. Before the birth of my son, my husband did not stop spending much time with friends instead of family. I had to arrange a strict and frank conversation. Really helped. We live together happily!