“Bad” words: how to wean a child to swear

Sooner or later, parents can be unpleasantly surprised to hear words from their child that are completely inappropriate for the children. There are many places where you can hear curses: street, kindergarten, school, TV, Internet, even at home. As you know, any child as a litmus test absorbs any information, and bad words are no exception.

To the bad words we include insults, rudeness, obscene language. If a child begins to use slang expressions, which are inherently neutral, this is already an alarming bell for parents. The vocabulary of children develops with them at a very fast pace, so it is important to notice negative impregnations in the speech of your child in time.

Why the child began to swear and swear, and how to wean him from this, we will understand together.

Age

Depending on the age of the child, the use of swear words may be deliberate or meaningless at all. Up to 5 years, the child may not understand what this or that word means, causing horror and indignation among mom and dad. Hearing a curse somewhere and seeing the reaction of others around him, the baby may try to use it, but not understand what he said, and how to use the word in general. From the beginning, the baby does not even understand that this is bad.

You should not react too sharply to the first attempts of a child’s foul language, he is now looking at your reaction, trying on a new model of behavior. Your correct tactic is to calmly explain to your child that you can’t say bad words, educated intelligent people don’t express themselves like that, and in your family no one speaks and will not speak.

After five years, a child is characterized by the development of moral and aesthetic qualities; children of this age already well understand what behavior is considered the norm in society, both children and adults. Using obscene and abusive language, the child most often already pursues some goal, although he may still not fully understand the meaning of “strong” expressions.

In this case, in addition to a calm conversation with the child, find out why he needs it and act on the basis of this knowledge.

Attention

The reason for the child’s profanity may be a banal lack of attention from loved ones. If your child in every possible way tries to attract attention by asking to play, demonstrating his achievements, crafts, drawings, stories about his life, friends, but you do not react, the child will choose a different path. He will begin to express himself swearly and you, willingly or not, show interest. The result will be achieved, despite your negative reaction.

Like an adult

In the life of children, the period comes very quickly when they want to grow faster, imitate parents, older brothers and sisters everywhere. In a kindergarten or school, a child can also have a friend, an informal leader that the kid wants to be like.And if the “idol man” uses “bad” words, swears, then the child begins to imitate him in order to appear older, as if generating confidence and strength in himself. Children tend to idealize the person they like. If the whole image is positive, then everything that this person does is good. The team of peers idols - physically strong guys, leaders, rebels.

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Tell the child that no matter how good a person is, curses do not paint anyone, no matter who he is. Explain that success and leadership have nothing to do with foul language and humiliation of other people, on the contrary, a cultured and decent person must achieve more in life.

The role model can be a movie hero, a movie hero on the Internet. Psychologists around the world unanimously reiterate the dangers of programs and films that are not suitable for children by age, so you should listen to the competent opinion of specialists and choose the right film industry products for your child, as well as control the interests of the children on the World Wide Web. Do not make these actions manic so that the child does not cease to feel free, having the right to choose.

Personal example

Virtually all children whose parents curse and swear, also begin to express themselves swearingly. Close people are the most important example for a growing child. Try to never use obscene expressions in speech, do not humiliate and do not call each other even in a quarrel, or especially a child. Talk with older children, let them also understand that they are an example to follow, and should monitor speech and behavior.

If the child has already witnessed how you scold and say “bad” words, admit that you did wrong, didn’t want to offend anyone, and never do that again. Keep your word.

How bad

It happens that a child begins to swear and call names when his self-esteem drops greatly. Poor grades at school, pranks for which he is always blamed, losing in competitions, lack of success in creativity or sports - all this greatly affects the child’s self-esteem. When everyone around repeats that he is bad, that he does not succeed, the baby begins to act as bad, as if fulfilling a public message and mood. It is in your power to make it clear to the child that he is respected and appreciated, that if he has misses in some areas, then achievements in others will surely appear. Pay attention to attempts to improve yourself, praise and support the child in every possible way.

Revenge

The child’s foul language may be associated with a desire to avenge offense, coercion by relatives. They made us go to the doctor, didn’t let us go for a walk, didn’t let us watch an adult movie - get a “strong” word. In this case, the child understands that it is unpleasant for parents, and that becomes an incentive to say so. Various situations in the family have a big impact on the child: divorce, clarification of relationships, the birth of a brother or sister, moving relatives to you, etc. The child begins to express obscenely, protesting against uncomfortable and unpleasant situations for him.

You, as parents, should talk with the child and find out the causes of resentment, eliminate, if possible, trouble, explain why you did this and not otherwise. Talking about "bad" words is also necessary so that the child can realize that he, as a successful and cultured person, does not need to swear.

Collective

In order not to be a black sheep in the company of peers, characterized by swearing, the child can also begin to express themselves. Let the child understand that such behavior will not lead to success, that a team where abuse is considered the norm is not worthy of attention and imitation. Explain that all difficulties can be overcome without abuse, and leadership can be achieved by being cultural.

Some more tips

If you set a goal - to wean a child to swear and swear, be firm. Speak clearly and clearly; your solid “no” should not be broken.Show indignation and aversion to "bad" words, talk about the consequences and possible insults of friends and relatives. Take care of yourself and your family members, do not swear by the guests. Talk with your child on an equal footing, do not punish and do not humiliate, turn the conversation so that the child can draw conclusions himself, and did not think that you are imposing your opinion on him.

Be attentive to children, help and encourage, teach to express your feelings and emotions, because behind the swear words there can be an inability to do this. Foul language is a problem in raising a child, which is completely solvable, the main thing is to be patient.

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