How to raise and raise an optimistic child? Tips for Parents

Content

Loving parents want to see their children happy. Optimism is an indispensable feature of a happy person. It helps to enjoy life, teaches to cope with negative emotions. The origins of an optimistic outlook on life are laid in childhood.

All mothers and fathers want the child to grow up a happy, confident, purposeful, cheerful person. These qualities are characteristic of optimists: people who see life on the positive side are confident in a better future. Tips for parents on how to raise optimism in their child.

What gives optimism as a personality trait?

Optimism is not stupid joy about and without and not indifference to the surrounding problems. This is primarily the understanding that tomorrow will be better than yesterday. And during the growing up period it is very important for the child to instill optimism.

Helps the formation of an open view of the world, an independent point of view, determination and determination;
It is a way to control your emotions. Deals with doubts, fears, disappointments;
Helps a person overcome obstacles in life;
Promotes the development of sociability and goodwill;
Helps maintain immunity;
Forms an attitude towards a healthy lifestyle.

Where does optimism come from?

All babies are born optimistic. They joyfully smile at us from the cradle; learn to roll over with all their might; take their first steps despite falls and bruises. The task of mothers and fathers is not to repay in their child the desire to enjoy life, enjoy everyday events. Often we are “not allowed!”, “Do not touch!”, “Dangerous!” we extinguish the child’s desire to know the world and receive joy from their own actions. This creates a sense of danger, fear of action.

Communicating with the child, parents largely convey to him their vision of the world. If mom and dad radiate confidence in the future, rejoice at the present, calmly perceive and overcome difficulties, this is what their child is learning.

An optimistic worldview is laid in the kid when he is given the opportunity to achieve something with his own work, when his efforts are noticed and positively reinforced, when he feels confident and comfortable. Very important psychological support for adults, it strengthens the belief that the world around us is stable and beautiful. Parents are faced with the task of strengthening their child in such a vision of the world.

How to raise optimism?

To raise an optimist, parents need to start with themselves. Are you yourself a cheerful person who perceives life in a positive way? Recall a simple example: a glass filled with water or any other liquid is exactly half full.The optimist will say that the glass is half full, and the pessimist - that it is half empty. And so we must learn to see in the most ordinary things a positive beginning, to use the opportunities that openrather than concentrating on the cons.

Recommendations for parents on raising optimism:

Communicate with your child in a positive way. Communication should show the child your love and tenderness. Show sincere participation and interest in the affairs of the baby, as far as possible share his activities. Hug and kiss more often, just pat on the head. So the child will feel his value, significance. Unfortunately, very often our communication with children is an endless stream of comments and directions. “Put things in order”, “Wash your hands”, “Sit down for lessons” - this is what our children hear from us all the time. While psychologists have proved that during the day a person needs at least eight hugs to feel good.
Provide your baby with reasonable independence. Psychologists advise: do not do for the child what he is able to do himself. Of course, an adult will make a bed or will tie shoelaces faster and better than baby. But when the child puffs and gets the result, he learns to be independent. Increases his self-confidence, self-esteem. Of course, be sure to be near and, if necessary, help, encourage, praise.
Allow more, prohibit less. Try to formulate the necessary prohibitions without the prefix "no." Instead of “Don’t eat sweets” say: “First you eat soup, and then sweets can be eaten”. The child’s psyche is designed so that he does not hear the “not” particle, but concentrates on the statement itself.
Formulate positive attitudes. What significant adults say, the baby takes it for granted. “You are still small, you will not be able to”, “She is weak with us”, “He does not have the ability to learn” - this is how we program children for a negative result. Hearing such things, the peanut will not make efforts to overcome difficulties, but will try to comply with the attached "label".
Seek occasion for praise and joy. Even if the baby does not succeed, find the pluses in the situation: remember his achievements and successes, note the efforts made, encourage your faith in achieving the goal. Your confidence will be transferred to the little man, will breathe the desire to achieve a result.
Celebrate the merits and achievements of the child, not comparing with others. Help the baby to set feasible tasks and achieve the goal. Focus on the successes the child has achieved, not in comparison with others, but in relation to himself. "You learned to write letters beautifully," and not, "Ani has a very beautiful handwriting, not like yours." A person needs to learn to enjoy his achievements, to enjoy his "growth".
Learn to perceive mistakes as an incentive to correct them.. Mistakes are an essential experience in knowing the world. Do not scold the child for them, otherwise in the future he will try to hide them from you, afraid to make a mistake. And this can discourage the desire for any activity, contributes to the formation of uncertainty and lack of initiative. Do not regret it yourself correct the mistakes. Provide the necessary help, if it is required, or outline the steps to eliminate the shortcomings by the child.
Take your time to get the desired result.. We want the child to study perfectly, speak English, achieve success in the sports section, and also play the violin. Not every child can do it. He submits to us, while he himself does not receive pleasure from his activities and begins to quietly hate his studies, and maybe even us. Patience and time - these are the components of success in any business.
Help your baby distract from a dull moodbad thoughts. Switch his attention to funny, joyful events. Treat failures with humor, look for positive points in any situation. This will teach the peanut to enjoy life, will form a positive attitude.
Talk with your baby about his feelings.. This will help him understand his emotions, learn how to manage them. In addition, the child will feel that you understand him and sincerely empathize with him. You are on the same wavelength as him.

So ... Rules "NEVER ..."

never do not tell the child: “What have you done!” A rude cry and unconstructive criticism discourage the desire to correct a mistake;
never do not make labels: “Loser!”, “Onion woe!”, “Coot!”, “Dumb!”, “Muddler!”, “Masha-confused!” etc. Remember - the child trusts you, if you think so about him, then such labels can stick for life;
never don’t put the baby’s shortcomings and blunders in the first place: “You always interrupt me ...”, “Are you deaf?”, “Can't you understand that ...”, “The picture is nothing, but then you circled wrong, and this cow Is it really blue ?! ” The emphasis on failure erases the program of success in the life of the child;
never do not stop the child’s attempts to tell you what interests him: “Oh, well, you’re with your doll again, read a book better ...”, “Leave me alone, I'm tired ...”;
never, even in the worst nightmare, do not compare your child with another son or other daughter of that "advanced" neighbor who is "always-doing-everything-as-necessary." These are completely different patterns.

We also read: 10 phrases that make children of notorious adults

What do we have to do

wake up with children in joy, notice the best moments of the morning: a cheerful sunny bunny, a fabulous room flooded with the sun, a cheerful toiler, a washing machine, a carefully buzzing kettle, etc .;
encourage children to see the beautiful around them on a walk: a beautiful flower, a blue sky, a cute rumbling cat, strong and kind dad's hands, etc .;
laugh more and play fun games with the kids - This is their natural language. Kids love the fun! And the mother, who allowed herself to “come off,” in the game with the child, as a rule, feels rejuvenated;
we analyze any difficulties and failures, starting with the recognition of the child’s success, for example: “You did well this caterpillar - like alive! But the frog can be corrected here a little - and it will be great! ”
teach kids to dream and encourage the development of bold imagination. “Son, what if our car suddenly began to fly? I clicked on the button - iii - raz! Flew away to the monkeys! Clicked - II - two! Already in the desert! ... What would you do there? ”
correctly extinguish the manifestations of moods at the stage of their origin, and best of all - anticipate. To achieve this, you need to analyze the real possibilities of the child, your style of upbringing, highlight frequently occurring problem situations and think over other ways to resolve it.

We also read: “I educate as I see fit!” or 5 parenting myths | 7 parenting mistakes that prevent children from succeeding

And do not forget the main rule: children adopt our vision of the world, our values and attitudes. Be the way you want to see your own child. And if you don’t like something about him, take a closer look at yourself. Perhaps he learned this from you? Try yourself to be optimistic about the world, enjoy everyday activities, and your children will learn this. After all, no matter what, life is beautiful!

We also read:

President of the Association of Child Psychologists, psychologist, pediatrician, father of five children, Alexander Kuznetsov, visiting the morning show of Sergey Stillavin:

Olesya 04/25/2016 at 11:30

I agree with the premise that you must begin first of all with yourself. From your attitude to life. In families where they constantly swear or complain about the hardships of fate, an optimistic child is unlikely to grow up. As the famous saying goes: do not raise a child, he will grow up like you.
Olya 04/25/2016 at 11:31

I think that if you raise a child only in a positive way, then a person will grow up who will look at the world through pink glasses, which means that he will be unsuitable for the harsh realities of life. Positive is good, but there should be a measure even in it.