How to tell a child “DO NOT”

Your baby is growing. His playful hands can already "clean up" in the most inappropriate places for this. For parents, this is an unnecessary concern, because the crumb can not only spoil things, but also expose itself to a certain danger.

How kids perceive bans

Any child learns the world around him, and therefore he is very interested in what will happen if he touches the pan on the stove or puts his pants on his head. If this or that action is prohibited, a reaction in the form of tears or anger may follow. This is quite normal, as the baby protests.

The child is not yet able to assimilate any prohibitions the first time, and can do the same tomorrow that was impossible today. This does not mean at all that he is acting in vain for you, just that any “impossible” is not perceived by him in a global sense.

Another feature of the perception of prohibitions in children is the inability to transfer the situation to a similar one. If you forbade him to touch the microwave, this does not mean that he will not fit the mixer. Do not think that the baby has decided to “annoy” you. This is a peculiarity of perception, so be patient.

Advice for adults

Do not abuse forbidden words

Do not compromise the interests of the little researcher. Let him run around on the street, touch all kinds of objects, drive a neighbor's cat. You can wash any clothes, and wash your hands with a face.

Children under the age of three do not understand that the same action can be performed at home and not in public. Or, on the contrary, at the playground you can play with water, but at home it is undesirable. In such cases, try to explain the situation to the child without using forbidden words or distract the game.

After the child reaches the age of three, he begins to understand more.He is already able to understand the difference between a drawing album and wallpaper in the hallway, so now the prohibitions can be specified. For example, the iron can be touched when it stands in its place on a shelf and cannot be touched - if mom is ironing things.

Explain the reason

Any of your prohibitions must be accompanied by an explanation of the reason. The child must understand that the action is actually dangerous, it is not your whim.

When explaining, use those words whose meaning the child already knows. Speak a language that he understands. In addition to words, the physical perception of each “impossible” is also important. For example, you can give the baby to touch the hot kettle on the stove, but then, when the degree of heating will no longer threaten burns to the delicate skin of the child.

Alternative to bans

It is not without reason that our Russian language is called great and powerful, and you should use it to the fullest extent possible. Try to pick your own "can" to any "no" and use it more often. For example, you can’t touch the pan on the stove, but you can take the soup ladle from the table. Such "cans" distract the child from forbidden things, while not interfering with his development and cognition of the world.

Already at this age, the baby should have its own things, similar to adult items. Then you do not have to prohibit anything, it will be enough to explain which father’s hammer and which is Colin’s. The crumbs will lose interest in your things, and their importance will increase.

We read on the topic:

• 5 alternatives to say NO to your child
• What can and cannot be forbidden to a child
• How to ban a child without banning

Systems approach

Any categorical prohibition should remain so always, in any situation. Otherwise, the child simply won’t understand why the same action was forbidden yesterday, and today it suddenly became available. The kid can decide that everything is "impossible" depend on the mood of the elders and in fact do not conceal absolutely no danger. Do not practice permission forbidden if you need to make time for your affairs.

The rest of the family should take the same approach. After all, it often happens that a grandmother or dad can do something that mom does not allow. And this negatively affects the authority of the mother. It is possible that in the future the child will cease to hear it “impossible” and will ask the same from other adults. All prohibitions should be uniform, they should not be canceled even in case of tears and tantrums.

At the same time, some flexibility can be shown. You can allow the child a little more if, for example, he is ill. But in this case, you must explain that the permission applies only to the period of the illness.

Avoid Provocative Moments

It happens that parents themselves provoke children to certain actions. For example, a child was repeatedly forbidden to touch daddy's paper, but how can temptation be avoided if they constantly lie on the table and are not even put away in a drawer? There are a lot of such situations.

Keep all important documents out of the reach of the child, and even better - under lock and key. The same goes for any valuable and fragile things. Do not tempt your baby unnecessarily.

I would also like to remind you about the safety rules for a child in the house. Protect the baby from any piercing and cutting objects, sharp corners, close access to outlets, glasses and mirrors.

We read on the topic: how to secure a home for a child.

Forbid correctly

• First of all, watch your intonation. Leave aside all screams and abuse, speak in a calm tone. So the baby will learn to perceive what was said, and not be afraid of your angry appearance. But at the same time, you need to show the crumb your displeasure and resentment, so that over time he begins to understand when you are upset by his behavior. And it is also advisable to forget about threats, if you do not want to instill fear in a child instead of respect. We read an article on the topic: What should I do if I constantly scream at my child?;
• Respect the baby as a person. In any conflict, do not use offensive words. This will only lower the child’s self-esteem and are unlikely to look like an authoritative person in his eyes;
• Keep prudence. Remember your desires in childhood. What did you want most? Maybe there is an opportunity to allow this to your child, but with the observance of precautions ?;
• As you grow older, all bans must be adjusted according to the age of your child. The child grows, every year his abilities develop and improve. Allow him to turn on the light, help you in the kitchen or wield scissors over an unnecessary newspaper, while observing the necessary precautions;
• And most importantly, a personal example. Do not demand from the child that which you cannot do by yourself. The lack of foul language, punctuality, respect for elders and much more can be brought up only on the example of personal positive quality.

Try to keep your list of bans minimal. Say the words "no" and "no" in extremely dangerous situations, and at other times replace them with alternative "can." Over time, you will see that your child’s obstinacy will give way to obedience.

We read on the topic of psychology and education:

• Raising a child up to a year: Tips for parents, games and toys;
• How to react and deal with the vagaries of a child – https://kid.htgetrid.com/en/psihologiya-detey/kak-reagirovat-i-borotsya-s-kaprizami-rebenka.html;
• 25 tips how to raise a child in love and tranquility;
• 10 tips how to stop yelling at your children;
• Features of the psychology of parenting up to a year.

Watch the video: How to tell a child is NOT