12 signs of a spoiled child

A spoiled baby is a real headache for parents. Constantly seeking his own, he begins to consider himself the main person in the world. If the minion is faced with legal requirements and prohibitions, then a loud tantrum awaits her mother. How to re-educate a little egoist? How to understand that your child is too spoiled? In our material, the advice of psychologists for those parents who allow their children too much.

Spoiling can add a lot of unpleasant moments to an already grown child. In adulthood, no one will constantly admire him, solve all his requests for the wave of a magic wand. Hence the collapse of hope and deep disappointment in the people around him. Let's look at the most striking and distinctive features of children's spoilage.

Signs of a Spoiled Baby

1. The child categorically refuses to share. Spoiled children are egocentric, because they are provided with everything that they wish, upon request. Toys, sweets, your attention - it is not surprising that they refuse to share with peers and adults.
2. He often arranges tantrums. Attacks of spontaneous hysteria are relatively normal in children under the age of three to four years. Sometimes this is the only way to express their feelings, but among preschoolers, hysteria is already a means of manipulation.
3. He is extremely dependent on his parents. If your child cannot fall asleep when you are not in the room, does not want to stay with your grandmother or in kindergarten, then this is already a sign of spoiling. As they grow older, children need to learn how to feel comfortable with other people.
4. Selective in food. There is nothing wrong with preparing special meals for a child with special dietary needs. But if a healthy baby insists on an individual menu every night, this may be a sign of spoiling.
5. He is always dissatisfied with everything. The kid grumbles for any reason: he does not like toys, clothes, cooked soup. He is quickly tired of new cars and a trip to the park. He immediately demands to buy a thing that he saw from another child: “I want the same scooter!”
6. He does not help parents. It is perfectly normal to help your child clean toys if he is under the age of three more. But when you continue to put things in order behind him further, he becomes convinced that this will always continue.
7. He is rude to adults. The habit of getting what you want leads to the fact that the child begins to relate too consumerly to parents. Why be polite to those who fulfill all his requirements? Disrespect for mother often goes to general rudeness. (Read Why are children rude?)
8. The child has to be persuaded. A spoiled kid does not recognize authorities - parents, grandmothers and educators. Therefore, their requirements do not mean anything to him.If a child is asked for something, he begins to be mischievous. And mother can get what she wants only after much persuasion.
9. He is manipulating adults. Rude, obsessive, manipulative behavior is characteristic of capricious children. To achieve his own goal, the child uses all available means: tantrums, tears, a different approach to parents. If mom does not buy ice cream, he will go to grandmother. “Granny, I love you more than anyone else,” he will say until she forbids him something.
10. It makes parents blush. A spoiled kid considers himself the center of the galaxy. To attract attention, he can interrupt adults, shout loudly, arrange tantrums with a large crowd of people. Inability to behave in public places sometimes becomes a real problem, which, due to permissiveness, is difficult to fix.
11. Not responsible for their actions. No matter what the baby, beloved mother, kind dad, and his grandmother and grandfather, who adore him, immediately “liquidate” any consequences. Hit the neighbor girl? So she herself is to blame. In such greenhouse conditions, children grow, but do not grow up.
12. He does not perceive the words "no" and "impossible." It’s hard for spoiled children to understand that they might not get something. Involuntary desires are excusable for very young children, but for 4-6 year old babies it is not peculiar. A capricious child accompanies any failure with loud sobs, perceiving it as the end of the world.

We also read:

• How to say “NO” and “NO” to the child
• 5 alternatives to tell your child “NO”

Reasons for child spoilage

Babies are not born spoiled, weeping loudly to their mother about their basic needs - mother's attention, food, food, diaper change. But if you over-patronize a child, constantly entertain him, if only he does not roar, then he will soon become the center of the whole family.

We also read: why the baby is crying and how to understand the reasons for crying

Very often, a capricious child grows up with parents who cannot agree on the basic methods of education. The kid begins to manipulate, command and control adults, seeing such disagreements. When dad forbids, he goes to his beloved and kind mother. And if she doesn’t allow it, then you can always turn to my grandmother.

Variability in prohibitions is also unacceptable. For example, yesterday, children were allowed to walk through puddles. However, today in response, he hears the loud “No!” and then begins to resent.

Many busy mothers and fathers try using gifts and various trinkets to compensate for the lack of time to communicate with the baby. But along with the child, his demands increase. And then the parents understand - spoiled!

We also read: how to raise children: carrot or stick?

Psychologist's advice to parents of spoiled children

• Keep calm

Remember that the only way to control the situation is to remain calm. Loud screams will not force the child to obey you. Do not raise your voice, even if the baby is hysterical or begins to be rude. Ignore his behavior: "I will talk to you later when you calm down a bit."

• Start re-education as early as possible

As soon as you begin to understand that the baby is crying and screaming in order to get the right thing, immediately stop the little manipulator. Do not indulge him, fulfilling any desire, in the hope of stopping tantrums and nagging. The golden rule says: "It is easier to prevent a disease than to treat it for a long and painful time."

• Be consistent

If today you allowed your child to jump on the couch, and tomorrow you strictly forbid it, your rules have no effect. Permissions and prohibitions must be agreed with all households. The reaction of grandparents and parents should be reasonable and unanimous. Stay true to your word: do not repeat the threat to pick up a toy for bad behavior several times. Follow your warning right away.

• Learn to say no

For many adults, refusing a beloved baby often becomes a very difficult decision.Therefore, a spoiled child perceives parents as walking wallets, receiving different gifts every day. Instead of another (hundredth in a row) machine, give it more time: read, walk, play together.

• Enter the term “obligation” in the child’s dictionary

Explain how much and hard mom and dad work: they earn money for food, clothes for the baby, cook for him, clean up after him and wash. Ask him to help around the house, although at first you will have to redo everything after him. The first duty of a little minion will be to return the toys scattered with his hands in place.

Do not go too far, starting to re-educate your spoiled child. He may decide that you stopped loving him, if you had allowed everything before, but now you forbid the same thing. Be sure to explain that you love the baby as before, but you do not always like his actions. And of course, take grandparents as allies.

We also read:

• How to re-educate a spoiled child
• How to react and deal with the vagaries of a child
• Comfortable baby. Is obedience always good?

Spoiled baby. What to do?